| (no subject) |
[Jan. 31st, 2010|04:57 am] |
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this fucking gives me the creeps. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 20th, 2010|05:16 am] |
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it's becoming unsafe. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 20th, 2010|02:09 am] |
only on the brink of falling asleep for the night can i coin beautiful, nonsensical word combinations.
each phrase repeats itself for me one time before distorting due to over-think. simply being in this state of mind puts me well past the point where i can move my body out of bed to even the closest pen.
one day i'll make it up to the pen.
and the next morning or a week from then i will let out a curious whatthefuck?
and go from there. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 17th, 2010|06:48 am] |
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i demand a hallucination for all of these explanations. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 3rd, 2008|01:28 am] |
Voiceover: Don't let THIS happen to you!
Steve: I got six inches from his face and said "fuck you! I'm not afraid of you!"
Billy: You yelled at a spider?
Steve: Ey, I called it an asshole.
Billy: So what'd you do?
Steve: I took the lid of a CD spindle and trapped him on the wall. I watched him flip out for a few minutes.
Billy: You just watched him ey?
Steve: Now I'm standing on the edge of my bed in my boxers, when I see another spider on the ground near my foot. I fell and the spider i was holding fell onto my shirt. I flung it away and started crying. The other spider turned out to just be a stain in the carpet.
Billy: How's the foot, did you break it or something?
Steve: No, just a sprain.
Billy: A sprain? Jesus, man you've been here a week.
Steve: Well. I'm not sleeping in that room until dad kills the spider. He said he did, but I'm pretty sure he's lying. I'm just going to stay here, maybe another week or so.
Billy: How much is this costing you, man?
Steve: What do you mean? Us Canadians are supposed to pay for health care like everybody else?
Billy: Yes, under the new laws, us Canadians must now pay to see a doctor. I don't like this and I blame THE GOVERNMENT.
Steve: Yes, THE GOVERNMENT, I hate the NEW GOVERNMENT!
Billy: We should protest, no, we should KILL them!
Riot police storm the room and begin clubbing the the two men.
Police: Therese are the CANADIAN TERRORISTS we've been looking for! It's a good thing the new laws allow us to find more terrorists!
A clown dressed up as a cowboy walks out in front of the beating.
Clown: When you hear a Canadian complain about paying for health care, tell 'em you've been doing it your whole life! Then kick their ass until it's red white and blue! Kids are your parents talking bad about the government? They may be terrorists, be sure to tell your teachers!
[This message brought to you by North American President Rice, stay tuned for a message from Vice President Seacrest.] |
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| i have no idea where this is going |
[Oct. 5th, 2007|12:19 am] |
I walked into the liquor store with no plans of coming out. They call it suicide by cop. It's when you instigate a cop into killing you. I imagine it's quick and painless and plus there's the chance you really fuck up the piece of shit cop's life. I went right to the back and began pocketing tiny bottles of vodka. The damn kid at the counter didn't even notice. For a second I think about leaving with some free liquor. I get to a shelf a bit closer the counter and clear my throat. I reach for a large bottle of cheap wine and stick it in my jacket.
Sir, what're you doing?
Shoplifting.
I make my way toward the door and the kid just sighs and picks up his cell. Punk didn't even care. No loyalty to the job with kids these days. Prick.
So I'm standing outside of the store with a coat stuffed with alcohol, waiting for the cops to show up. One will make his way over to me to 'ask me a few questions' while his partner goes inside to check things out with the boy. Before he get's too close I'm going to break this bottle on this wall and charge at him.
Best case scenario is Officer Cocksucker plugging me before I accidentally do some real damage..
Worst case scenario: I put a few holes in Officer fuckface's neck moments before cocksucker can club me in the head a few times. The whole thing would be a really big deal in the community and they'd probably show me on TV. I can't wake up in a hospital. I can't wake up in a jail cell. My life can't get any worse. Really it's not possible. I can't wake up ever again. I woke up for the last ever this morning. At 2. I hope death isn't like waking up, I can't stand the feeling. The feeling of instant discouragement is usually my first conscious thought hitting me like a truck at the crack of noon.
It's taking them forever. And it's fucking cold. I should wait inside.
I've already phoned the police, cocksucker.
Oh. That's cool. It sure is taking them a while to get here. The boy is typing words into his phone.
Chances are I'm going to die tonight, kid.
No answer.
I drop the bottle of wine I'm holding on the ground, boy could've hit the ceiling he jumped so high. I laugh and drop another bottle.
About 11 broken bottles later a police car pulls in. A young pig and and old pig, both armed with-
-tazers. I scan them for anything resembling an actual weapon. Nothing. What kind of pussy town is this? I don't want to be zapped, maced, and clubbed in the head.
You going to come quietly, junkie?
I'm not a junkie, I just want a bullet to the head.
[not done/who knows] |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 9th, 2007|02:08 am] |
idiocracy is beoming a reality. i'm pretty sure it will be amoung the first movies to be sent down the memory hole. what really depresses me is how fast this addiction has set in. americans watch more tv than anyone. we don't give a shit about current events so we just pick a team and root for it in "adult talk" while you quote all of these assholes on cnn and fox news. i don't even know their names. these people actually report on pedophile politicians and "mistakenly" label him a democrat for about a week. ooops. and nobody even cares. the whole nation has add.
"hey, i don't think i like what you're doing-"
"hey look! paris spread eagle getting out of a limo!"
"i like sex."
anyone who doesn't fall for it is labeled unpatriotic, conspiracy wingjob, french, homosexual, blashpemous etc. and when we get too close- they kill us. soon it wil bea moot point to even try to get into the politician game. it's the new hollywood and the market is about to flood. all of the bad, bad, movies made with so many nobody actors that were made in the dawn of hollywood- that is washington dc now. it's growing so big. the mob is in on it, the church is on it, everyone's in on it except the dumbasses in the audience. "we need more dumbasses" says the growing industry. and so they form the department of education and later instate "no child left behind" and scores plummit. do you see what they did there? they did the OPPOSITE of what they said they would. they lied. they don't care. they are laughing at your dumb kids and making money in the new hollywood. and nobody cares. why does mankind have these problems ALL OF THE SUDDEN. we were a race on the path of discovery and we just took "the tool" way too far. wow.
and add. what bullshit that is. we let our kids eat so much shit. i'm not complaining, i'm just trying to point out things generations before us didn't have. i'm just trying to figure out what went wrong. your grandparents were right when they bitched at you, but you should have listened to his rants once in a while. now they're all dead and there isn't a generation alive that doesn't know a thing that doesn't come out of their tvs. and is spreading. when tv first came out nobody could predict ANOTHER box being invented. one that could be even better than the tv?! no fucking way. and then the computer hits big in 98. fuck.
now i have to move the tv to where i can see it from the computer. but guess what? i'm typing on one of these commmmmputtersssss right now. hyprocitical. ooops.
so while our great grandparents are dying off we sit here with our two boxes. WATCHING the magic box is no longer satisfying but TOUCHING the magic box and inputting information and clicking on pop up ads. and when "web 2.0!!!!" was the buzz we used these as ways to meet people.
do you really want to meet someone?
no.
you want to fuck someone.
that is the only reason for any of these sites. we just exploit ourselves to get to reach out.
chuck once said the telephone was invented because we are afraid to be close but we hate being alone. or something. i probably fucked it up. but the internet is such an extremity of that. you watch some older movies about boys "calling girls" and it's such a big deal, but it's a right of passage and i guess it worked. i mean- these people met and fucked.
but we are waaaaaaaaaay too exposed to each other. but we love it. it's no good. i love it. shit, without myspace, there'd be a few less notches on my bedpost. fun fun. but what about calling someone and taking them out to dinner and a movie and getting to know them outside of school and work?
what the fuck happened to that? i see the shit in movies and it looks like fun. nowadays:
[over aim im]
boy: hey would you like to go out friday? we could grab a pizza and see [movie franchise]3 maybe?
girl: idk i'v been eating frozen pizza liek all week. plus i already downloaded the movie.
boy: oh.
girl: also i'm repeating the 11th grade.
i don't even know anymore. we're becoming way too comfortable at home in our computer chairs. i wonder if in 15 years we'll be worshipping another box...oh wait- we're already at level 3- portables. i mean games, music players, phones (shit the [insert current hottness here] and it has every cliffnotes ever written on it.
i love my phone, i love texting, but it's really my love of thinking i have oh-so-many friends. i seriously have like 5. i don't call most of the people in my phonebook. it's yet another pussy vessel.
i am pretty sure i'm about to go on a date with a really cool girl. it's our first time really hanging out, until then our friendship has been 90% AIM and myspace and text. are we adapting?
chicks are apparently.
TIMELINE
at first computer nerds got zero pussy.
then women learned to extort the "smart guys" for money, that's cool.
then some kindof ramoanticism sweeps the nation, but it is quickly cheapened when seriously every awesome pick up line and dramatic speach has already been used on tv and copyrighted and made into a novelty t shirt.
and so we are out of ideas.
but animal instinct takes over. we MUST fuck to keep reproducing, and now the femail species- even the prized hotties who ACTUALLY AREN'T BRAINDEAD are absolutely fine with getting to know someone through a screen. you know what i think- i think i have to live up to this e-portrait i have painted. i use the 4 or 5 "good" pictures of me on myspace (nobody ever takes my picture, for good reason) so i am incredibly nervous about hanging out in person. i won't be me. i waste good conversation on text messages. what the fuck am i thinking. what the fuck are we thinking? we should all go back to landline phones- corded phones only.
"who were you on the phone with, son?"
"oh i was asking suzzyto the prom. you know, senior prom."
"alright, that's my boy. did she say yes?"
"no. she say saturdays are her RPG nights and her guild will be pissed."
".................................."
"....................................."
"..ah, yes. why on earth would the school have prom on an RPG night? i bet only the nerds will be there. Now son, joining a guild is a serious commitment. if you decide to get serious with this girl, feel free to come to me. my screenname is NEWHOTTNESS12, just IM me. or myspace me. i posted new beach pics today."
"you went to the beach?"
"nah i used photoshop"
"you're the best, dad!"
"by the way your mother and i are getting a divorce and i'm marrying a 14 year old girl from denver. i bought her online."
"did you get the points?"
"i got the points, we can get the conou, soon."
"oh i think suzy's dad did this, you guys should all party."
"fuck you, son. i'm ending this longwinded sketch. and we're never going out on the canuou. ever. because i've decided to be an alchoholic."
so it's a digital world. we hear that enough LIVING IN THE DIGITAL WORLD. FUCK ANALOG IN THE ASS! HDTV SATELLITE RADIO PLAYSTATION PORTABLE WIRELESS INTERNET PEER TO PEER MP3 OR FLAC FORMAT 5 POINT ONE SURROUND SOUND SOULS. i'm sick of it, weening myself off of this will be hard. i think i might buy a new book this week just to maybe jumpstart this process. i will feel the need to read more if i just buy a book. next i plan on cutting back on the internet so hard. i don't know how i should do it. i guess i'm going to have to break some habbits. no more straight to the computer when i'm bored i guess.
one day soon digital will be an outdated word. i predict the new hottness will be something retarded sounding.
okay so what have we established in this writing:
-idiocracy is coming true
-the box has infiltrated our social lives so deeply, it has caused me to worry about having to live up to something.
-we all have add and we're all addicted to e-crack
-i may or may not be getting laid thanks to myspace
i sat around for quite a bit before something really came to me to start writing, i don't think i touched much on what i wanted to write about, i guess that's how it will have to be.
i'm glad i re-read it and added more :) |
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